The Constitution returns to Bristol to showcase a fantastic line up of young talent. With 2 rooms and a host of electronic/dance genres, this is not one to miss. Taking you on an experience of Drum & Bass, Garage. Disco, Techno, Jungle, House (and maybe more) from 10pm until 3am.

This night is guaranteed to smack shades of shit out of your Tuesday night. Get yourself down to Basement 45.

LAST ENTRY 11:30PM

Room 1 (DnB/Jungle):
- VSYLUM
- DELZ
- P.A.B MC
- TUTHLESS
- MIFFZ
- DJ ZIVA

Room 2 (Disco, House, Garage, Techno...):
- VINDA
- GREENZ
- TOM.E
- YOURS TRULY
- DJ NATWORTHY
FULL STORY::

After a long arduous voyage, HMS MXE finally dropped her anchor in the tropical waters off a mysterious island. Her trusty crew were tired and run down after months of hard work and a strict diet of Aldi vegetable soup (37p / per can!) and Simons (semi-inanimate blobs). Unfortunately for some crew members, the soup and Simons had developed a severely hallucinogenic enzyme called Shat-TIC-Cov21 that causes extreme delusion and erotic behaviour. This was particularly a problem for Reuben ‘The Diamond’ Longdong, who was immediately plunged into a fourteen-millennia-long vision quest. Thankfully, the crew had recruited the help of experienced Arkham vigilante ‘Vsylum’, who was able to calm ‘The Diamond’ down and place him into a meditative state where he would later undergo mummification. After such stress, arriving in this tropical paradise was a breath of fresh air for most of the team, they quickly made themselves at home and began to settle into a desert island lifestyle in order to survive. Vinda transitioned to a strictly clam-based diet, where he would eat the meat, and suck on the pearls for vitamins, later using their shells as a ritual cloth. General Leviticus (previously known as אֵיבָר הַמִין הָזְכַרִי) decided to channel his inner chimp and accelerate to the top of every palm tree and violently throwing his faeces at every other inmate. The most regular victim of these excretory attacks was Groliver ‘got no teeth’ Twist, who despite his cries for “more!”, had it coming anyway. Meanwhile, Dr. Groctopus was set on establishing a long-term economic plan for the new island nation by foraging for miscellaneous debris from previous shipwrecks. Many of which were owned by the lyrical kingpin Don Pablow ‘can’t run out of’ EscoBarz, the doctor isolated the valuable items to be used as currency (not before personal use) in the near future. Just as Sir Benjamoan B Boodge was feeling mayhemuous by attempting to repopulate the island by mating with a nearby palm tree (time to lay off the soup & Simons!), an act that only put strain on the island’s supply of blister plasters. After a late arrival, DJ Delz delved into the islands shantics only to immediately turn away in horror and be like “what the FUCK have I gotten myself into?”. During this frenetiqué of absolute shit-housery, the perhaps only sensible member of the group, Seductress ‘Yours Truly’, was marginally concerned by the fact they had just washed up on a desert island with little-to-no food and water and thought that it was in everyone’s best interests to try and be rescued, so she decided to call in a favour from Lucien Grange and get a drone to come pick her up. Sexual tensions arose as the mythical Miffz, Živa the Diva, Tom.Oringal.E.org.uk & DJ Nat Unworthy rocked up and fought for mating rights over the last remaining can of soup. However, little did anyone know that much darker things were waiting for them on the horizon.

To be continued…

Entry requirements: — Read more — Read less